Dainty Kitty

Dead Like Me, Mittens & Snow Cream

I don't know what the finally tally was but we had to have gotten at least a foot of snow this weekend.  I wish I'd thought to take a few photos but I haven't left my apartment since I got home around two on Friday afternoon.  I have been nothing but loungy and pajama clad, watching the first season of "Dead Like Me."  All fourteen episodes. 

I did managed to do two things other than watch movies and old television shows.  One, I made snow cream for the first time...I was going to say since I was a kid but I think I made it with Nate over ten years ago.  Still, it's been a long time - you know, pollution and all that.  I couldn't help it...all that whiteness piled up outside and I didn't even have to leave my apartment to get any.    It wasn't exactly as I'd remembered it but it was till pretty good. 

I also finished my mittens.  Knitted with Di. Ve Autunno using the Easy Mittens patter in One Skein Wonders.  I had to add a few stitches to the hand but it was quick, easy knit and - hey! - I finished a pair of something!



I started the second Mrs. Beeton while I finished up season two of Bosom Buddies this afternoon.  I really need to do some housework before I go to bed but I think I'll placate myself with a load of dishes and a load of laundry and then a little more knitting along with an episode of the The Flight of the Conchords which I've heard is brilliant.  After all, I have to ease myself back in to reality....

The Weekend

It's sixty degrees outside and I have the windows open.  That is a beautiful thing. 

First of all, thank you for all of the hugs and comments from my last post.  This is unfamiliar territory for me and, while I feel pretty okay now, the news was...well, upsetting.

I have managed to do a couple of things this weekend, though. 

I covered a couch. 

A doll house couch but still a couch! It was a hideous yellow with flowers.  I think I'm back on the doll house kick but I'm not going to finish the one that I bought and started to build.  It's too cheap and flimsy.  Instead, I'm going to see if my dad would like to do a father/daughter project and help me build a fairly simple, plain, two story box house.  I haven't asked him yet - I might even have a template made before I do.  I'm sure he'll be willing - it'll just be a matter of finding time to do it.

I made Cheddar Baked Chicken for dinner which was phenomenal.  Seriously, I know it sounds weird with the cheddar and the Rice Krispies (although it's a combination I've seen one other time) but...I'm really looking forward to having the last piece for dinner tonight [edited to add: it's REALLY not very good the next day - it loses its crispness and it just kinda greasy.  I'm taking this as permission to eat every single bit the next time I make it].   Teeny tip - it's best right out of the oven.  I tried a bite as soon as it came out because I was a little leery and it was wonderful but the potatoes still had a few minutes so by the time we sat down it was still great but...much better right out of the oven.

I'm growing my hair out so I've been wearing scarves nearly every day.  This is one I found in the dollar section at Target.  A dollar!

I also picked up another one with skulls on it.  This photo, I noticed, is also a testament to the fact that I'm tired.  Hello, dark circles! 

Anyway, I love cute skulls like this sticker I have on my car:

And, yes, I really do carry a Vera Bradley purse.

I am also in love with the movie, soundtrack and star of Once.  It's a great movie and I can't stop listening to the soundtrack.  "Falling Slowly" won an Oscar which was nice because things I like never tend to win anything.  Bonus: Glen Hansard is yummy...and I don't even like redheads.  I also bought a cd by his band, The Frames, which is like more of Once which is beautiful.

Oh and I've nearly finished my other mitten. 

So that's it.  I'm sad that the weekend is nearly over but there's something that makes me feel better about starting a new week.  Before this weekend had even started, I had deemed last week The Week That Never Was because it Sucked. 

Bedrooms

I've never been very happy with my bedroom.  I rarely ever spend any time there so it's a room of cast offs and mismatched things.  I know mismatched things can be charming but no so much in my bedroom. 

Purchasing Harold and Maude, though, has got me thinking.    think I'm ready to start making my bedroom a more pleasant place to sleep.

The weekend before last, I spent Saturday afternoon hunting for a down comforter and duvet cover.  I got both for a song and have found it very hard to get out of bed since.  Last night I started an afghan for the cat chair (a yellow chair in the bedroom that my cats claimed years ago).   And I've been toying with the idea of arranging my books by color.  I don't think this would look good in my living room but I think I might pick out the colors that match my bedroom (blues, yellows, whites) and try it out there.  It's amazing how many like colored books you actually have when you start really looking.  I like this idea a lot but I'm not thrilled with the prospect of really doing it, though so we'll see.

So those are my ideas so far.  I've not felt the urge to do much recently other than sit on the couch with a movie and yarn and needles but I'm joining the YMCA tonight and we're going to start working out at least three times a week (starting tomorrow).  I don't exercise but I'm a bit terrified because had a physical last week and now it's sinking in that I'm really thirty-three years old and need to start actively taking care of myself.  Surprisingly, my overall cholesterol was normal (still have some work to do there, though) but my blood platelet count has me a bit worried.  I don't go back until next Friday so I'm trying not to think about it too much until I can talk to my doctor. 

I'm hoping this working out thing will get me back on track (a little sunshine would be mighty helpful, too) and wanting to actually do things - simple things, even - again.

Yawn.

No Fishing or Crabbing

...or being sad either.  Even the tired has left me although, come on, this is life - there's always going to be a little tired, right?

Thank goodness for feeling like myself again.  And an extra thank goodness for all of my friends and their comments and emails!

I have a tip for any cat or dog owners out there who might be having hair issues.  I'm diligent about vacuuming and Febreezing but I did a little internet research on Friday and combined a couple of ideas that worked like a charm!  And it was fairly easy, too.  I filled a spray bottle with one part water, one part liquid fabric softener and sprayed both my couches.  After letting it soak for a few minutes, I put on a rubber dish washing glove and rubbed it all over the couch - the cat hair balled up and it was easy to pick it off.   There wasn't much to pick up which made me feel better about my housekeeping skills.   I also sprayed the carpet and let it sit before I vacuumed.  I figure I'll hit the couches once or twice a week and use it on the carpets every time I vacuum.

It feels good to have a clean place.  I even washed nearly everything in my laundry basket - including a couple of sweaters and other things that have been there for awhile because they need special attention.  I wish I could have inspired myself to work in the craft room, too, because it's such a mess.  I hate even getting on the computer because the clutter is overwhelming.   It's more a storage space than a craft room and, even though I tell myself I'm not going to do it, it's so easy to just toss anything that doesn't go in the other rooms on the computer table or just out of sight of the door.   Terrible, I tell you.  I got a really cute toy sewing book from my brother for Christmas and I'm itching to sew but haven't because...this room is unbearable.  I don't know, maybe I'll find the inspiration this weekend - or maybe I'll just get fed up.  Something.

Anyway, speaking of that...I can't sit here any more.  Yuck. 

Hope everyone had a great weekend!   

Today's Lesson Learned

I haven't taken my crazy pills in over two weeks.  I ran out and meant to get a refill before I left for Norfolk but never did...and I meant to do the same as soon as I got back but work was busy and I was a little under the weather and then it was New Year's...so, again, I never made it. 

When I woke up this morning feeling like I did, I thought it was just the going back to work after a four day weekend blues but I continued to feel worse throughout the day.  Edgy, tired and terribly annoyed (and on a day when things going on at the office really don't allow me time to be edgy, tired and terribly annoyed, unfortunately).  Finally it clicked.  I never meant to go so long without taking them - it wasn't a trial separation or anything.  It just happened.  And it wasn't very much fun.  Especially when combined with a little PMS.   At least now I know that I certainly can't quite kick them cold turkey.  Not that I want to or anything.  Although, I went to the ob/gyn a couple of weeks ago and she said she'd like for me to get off them before I get pregnant.  I'm not planning to get knocked up any time soon or anything but, for some reason, once you turn thirty, ob/gyn's seem to really want you primed for baby carrying.         

I digress.  So now not only am I properly medicated but I took a few hours to give the apartment a good once over with a duster, some Dr. Bronner's soap, a mop and a broom.  As long as you don't peek into the craft room, my home is back where it should be (minus the pile of laundry I'm still working on) just like I, hopefully, will be by morning.

The snow here is amazing.  Icy and sparkly.  It almost makes me want to go for a walk...until I realize it's fourteen degrees outside.   I wish grown ups got snow days....

Christmas Meltdown

<rant>

I had a little Christmas meltdown last night.  There's just too much to do - especially since we're going to Norfolk, Virginia to visit my brother for the holidays this year.  When my dad called last night to let me know that dinner with his mom and her husband is Friday at six - just an hour after the children's holiday party starts at my office - I just lost it.  I cried.  And I was in such a great mood before that phone call.  I'd gotten my hair done and I was well on my way to getting a little housework done.

Between finding time for two Christmases, making stuff and shoping for Christmas, two office Christmas parties and deadlines here at the office...it's too much in two weeks.  Why in the world my company decided to have an incredibly important deadline on the last business day before a holiday is beyond me.  And my office also decided to have out grown up party the night before said deadline, the Thursday before the holiday.  I think office Christmas parties should to take place in late November - right after the Thanksgiving holiday - or early December.  I heard on the news today that one company decided to skip the annual party and gave everyone the day off instead.  Brilliant!  Sure, it's fun to get drunk with your coworkers but, when time is tight, I'd much rather have the day off to get things done and polish off the evening with my own adult beverage, thank you very much. 

I did manage to get a lot done after said meltdown. 

Last night was actually spent sewing which is something I haven't done in a long time.  I cut out the pieces for the Zakka Owl Style Pennant (which I'd bought material for yesterday, thank goodness, because now it has to be finished by tomorrow night), sewed up the little owls and stitched letters on their bellies (and managed to get fusible webbing all over my iron because the directions were terribly unclear and I've never used it before).  I should be able to finish it up any machine sewing tonight after dinner (if I'm not drunk, which sounds so good right now) so that I can do the buttons and beaks while watching NBC Christmas goodness tomorrow night. 

Have I mentioned that I've had a tick in my left eyelid for about two weeks?  Well, I have.  I feel like it's never going to go away.  Someone said it was due to lack of calcium.  I thought ticks like that were due to stress.  That makes more sense anyway. 

</end rant>

It Was Twenty-Seven Years Ago Today

John Lennon
October 9, 1940 - December 8, 1980

Better Today

After lounging until seven, falling asleep until nine and trying to go back to sleep until nine-thirty...I got up and cleaned the apartment.  I'm sure Betty, my downstairs neighbor, loved that I started laundry in my clunking washer at ten p.m. but you'll have that.  I try not to do laungry after eight but it just had to be done.  I needed black knee socks and clean nylons. 

And waking up to a pot of coffee and a clean kitchen certainly did wonders for my mood.  Now if I could only drag myself out of bed early enough to enjoy a cup of coffee while seated, rather than rushing from room to room, I'd probably be in a good mood nearly every day.     

Thoughts on Crazy Pills & Two Recommendations

I take two crazy pills* a day.  Well, I take one - the other I've recently gotten out of the habit of taking but I really need to make the effort again.  I take Wellbutrin in the morning and Celexa at bedtime when I remember.  I started out taking just the Celexa about a year or so ago but it made me amazingly sleepy.  I'd have trouble staying awake throughout the day and would take two hour naps when I got home from work.  My doctor added Wellbutrin to the mix to fix the sleepyheadedness. 

I've been taking it long enough now that I can't remember exactly what I felt like before but I do know there's a difference.  I am a happier person.  I laugh at the letters PMS or PMDD - ha ha ha! 

The reactions I get from others concerning the fact that I take antidepressants interest me.  When I first started talking them, my mom pretty much came out and said she didn't think it was a good idea for me to tell anyone about it.  Right.  I've had a blog for a bazillion years - I'm not one for secrets, Mom.  Besides, if depression is hereditary, it came from her side of the family.  Her mother took something for awhile (and shouldn't have stopped).   My very favorite reaction came from Dustin, whom I was dating at the time.  He didn't like the idea of me taking anything because one side effect is a possible lowered libido.  He suggested that I try something else first.   There was another reason he should have been much more worried about.  After taking the pills for awhile, I realized that he was part of my problem and broke off the relationship.

But I digress.  I had trouble with the idea of taking a pill at first, too, but wanted to talk about it rather than hide it.  I wasn't sure I wanted to be dependent on medication to be happy and I really didn't want to take another pill.  I got over that pretty quickly, though - it didn't take long for me to really feel how much better my life could be.   And, oddly enough, most people I talked to about it were either currently taking something themselves or they had in the past. 

I do still get the occasional unsure reaction - although they're rare.  It's hard to find the words to let someone know that I'm okay.  It's difficult to tell them that this depression isn't something I can cure with mind over matter or a better outlook on life.  It's not just a Bad Day.  I'm a generally happy person but this was out of my hands.  I won't take it forever, I hope, but I'm a better person for it and I'm not ashamed.

And there is a reason for this post.  I had an unfavorable reaction today that turned into something very positive and it just got me thinking.

Anyway, enough of that.

Recommendation One: Fur.  What an amazing, sensual, thought provoking film.  From the story to the sets and costumes - just beautiful.  And I won't give the reason this is odd (just go rent the movie) but I think this was Robert Downey, Jr.'s sexiest role.  Absolutely amazing.

Recommendation Two: Clean & Clear Advantage Acne Spot Treatment.  This stuff is amazing.  Seriously.  I almost wish I'd taken a before photo.  Matt and Brian are certainly not as glaringly noticeable as they were yesterday.  I fully expect them to pack their bags and head out for good by morning.

And, just to make this a little crafty: I finished one knitted Christmas gift today!   Two maybe three to go!

Oh, and there was a typo on my list - number twelve: Take a vacation (longer than a weekend) now financed by my parents.  Um, yeah, that should have read, "Take a vacation (longer than a weekend) not financed by my parents."  That makes MUCH more sense!

*Not meant to offend for those out there who might take an antidepressant.  It's just what I call them to lighten the mood and make it a little funny. 

Basking in the Extraordinary

I really had great intentions for today.  I switched my summer clothes for winter last weekend so my craft room is full of tubs of clothing and it's really just a mess in general.  So my main goal was to get it back in shape since the rest of the house looks pretty good.  I also wanted to knit a lot and maybe bake some cookies.  Oh and write a post that meant something.

Instead, I knit just a little, watched a lot of Veronica Mars Season 3 and ate raw cookie dough (if I had baked cookies they would have been from scratch - luckily I have a few break and bake cookies from Trader Joe's to tide me over until the I really get the urge to turn on my oven).  Maybe I'll carry over my plans to tomorrow but right now I'm basking in the fact that I don't have to do anything.  I napped twice today and am completely guilt free.  I didn't shower until seven-thirty and when I did, I didn't put on a spot of makeup or fix my hair.  I put on my favorite sweater, my hair up in a bandanna and walked over to the video store where I rented three one night videos...because I don't have to be anywhere or do anything.  And I relished in my choices - movies I want to see - Reign Over Me with Adam Sandler, the cartoon Meet the Robinsons and Fido, a zombie movie I've been waiting to see.  So I'm going to put my pajamas back on, make a toasted tuna sandwich and watch movies for the rest of the night - or at least until I fall asleep on the couch.   

But I did accomplish one thing I set out to do - inadvertently but accomplished never the less.  I wrote an entry that means something. To me anyway.

And aren't the gerberas pretty?  They're my favorite.